There's something to be said for Kitchen Table Wisdom - you know, like in the old days when people sat around the kitchen table after a meal and talked about life, the universe and the meaning of it all - as well as the gossip doing the rounds in town...

Well, that's what this place is - a place to share common wisdom, thoughts and feelings about things important and unimportant, that bring us joy, laughter and happiness and that trouble, sadden, confuse and anger us ...

What I write here is what's 'real' for me. It won't always be PC or 'nice'. We're missing out on true connection and chances to grow and change because there's too little authenticity, too little honesty, too much holding back what we really feel and mean.

Welcome to my world...

I used to have a copyright claim here, but I've removed it...

Ideas don't belong to anyone -

they come to those who are receptive and are to be used for the well being of all...

I find images and movies and music all over the web

and I use them to accent/expand on my thoughts and understandings...


If you feel you have experienced or received something of value in reading my posts,

please consider either:

Giving a Koha/Love Offering Here - Donate with WePay

or paying it forward to those who need

material and emotional/spiritual sustenance in this world...


Thank You


As You Think, So It Is - Your Beliefs Create Your Reality

If your Reality isn't Working for You, Create a New One!

Life Unlimited!


Namaste

(the Divine in me, recognises and honours the Divine in you)

Sahila




Showing posts with label surrender. Show all posts
Showing posts with label surrender. Show all posts

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Damned If I Do...


... damned if I don't...

How to get from here...


Right at this moment, I feel we are a mess, as a species...

Daily, in every place I look, I see/hear/feel a harsh, cruel darkness descending on us...

We've been in this place before, I know...

We could be excused for that in the Middle Ages and even up to the beginning of the Industrial Revolution, because it could be argued that we didn't know any better and/also didn't have the technology to do better, for the planet, for our fellow beings on the planet, for our fellow humans...

But that excuse is no longer valid...

So now we are in the midst of a final struggle, where we either commit, finally, to doing what we know is healthy for all life on the planet, or we drag much of life with us into a body and soul-killing blackness, from which we might never emerge...

I want to turn my back on it all and just do the best I can with what I have for me and the boy - AND - at the same time, that feels like collusion, collaboration - being like the Germans who knew what was going on under Hitler and turned their heads and hearts away...

And this time, it's a global issue, occurring on the environmental, economic, political, social, psychological, spiritual levels, all at once...

How to keep holding the space, doing what I can to push back against the blackness, make space for more light to come in, and stay present for the boy, stay sane, clear, tranquil, take care of our physical, emotional, spiritual needs?



... to here:


"The tranquil clarity, which is devoid of mental turmoil, alone is the samadhi which is the firm base for liberation.

By earnestly trying to destroy the deceptive mental turmoil, experience that samadhi as the peaceful consciousness which is inner clarity.

In yoga the term samadhi refers to some kind of trance and there are various kinds of samadhi.

But the samadhi I speak of is different.

It is sahaja samadhi.

From here you have samadhana [steadiness] and you remain calm and composed even while you are active. 

You realize that you are moved by the deeper real Self within.

You have no worries, no anxieties, no cares, for you come to realize that there is nothing belonging to you.

You know that everything is done by something with which you are in conscious union."
~Ramana Maharshi




I obviously haven't reached that state yet!

I get to it sometimes, for several moment, hours, a day even...

AND more often than not, I am so tired and depressed watching this train wreck happening all around me on so many levels, in so many arenas...

I've been thinking along several lines...

One is the concept of non-attachment which I think is related to sahaja samadhi, and I'll write about that in another post...

The other is the realisation that life in this reality IS about movement and change and our own participation, responsibility in that...

AND that I'm not sure anything in our current model can be saved...


Bucky Fuller said you cant fix a broken system - that you have to create something new alongside it... 

And who was it that said that you can't find solutions using the same thought processes that created the problems in the first place?

One idea that's been percolating in my thoughts has been that of using the Dual Power Strategy to move from here to there...

"Dual power is a method of struggle for the revolutionary transformation of society.    It presupposes a pre-existing, fundamentally flawed social order.
 
Within that society, those who envision a different future create alternative institutions (AIs) that embody their vision.
 
AIs are places for experimentation with new social forms as well as places for liberation for those who are oppressed within the larger society.   As AIs spread and diversify, they take on more and more of the functions of a larger social system: creating over time an "alternative social infrastructure" that fulfills economic, political, social, and cultural needs.   In addition to their direct functions, AIs demonstrate the viability of new ways of organizing society, and attract interest to the ideals behind them.

As the ideological monopoly of dominant institutions is broken and people increasingly rely on AIs, those who benefited from existing arrangements may seek to dismantle their upstart competitors.
 
At the same time, those who seek fundamental changes in society or who find the alternative ways of organizing it valuable, may seek to enlarge and strengthen the alternative infrastructure.
 
Counter institutions (XIs) are created both to defend the AIs and to promote their growth. These work to challenge and attack the status quo while creating, defending, and securing space for opposition and alternative institutions.  They do this with everything from political protests, to direct appropriation (of plantations, government buildings, factories, etc.) for the use of alternative institutions, to civil disobedience or armed resistance.
 
The line between AIs and XIs is seldom entirely clear as many alternative institutions are also self-promoting or defending.   Together the AIs and XIs form an alternative source of power in society which is "necessarily autonomous from, and competitive with, the dominant system, seeking to encroach upon the latter's domain, and, eventually, to replace it."

During the process of building the alternative institutions and the ideology that supports them, the advantage of dual power is the creation of real, and not merely political, momentum towards the revolutionary transformation of society.
 
Actual changes are ongoing, rather than postponed to a revolutionary moment, so needs unmet by the pre-existing order are being met during the struggle and no sector of society is told that its concerns can only be dealt with after victory is achieved.  That is, creation of AIs and the political space for them has intrinsic benefits, apart from the advancement of the revolutionary project.
 
Over the course of building AIs, the society at large is empowered, committed to change, and skilled in running society. Simultaneously, the credibility of a revolutionary vision is increased immensely by putting it into practice and by refining and improving it over time.
 
It is also conceivable that factional splits between revolutionaries and reformers (and all the shades in between) could be reduced by having a common project that both find useful. Those forces that would be sent to suppress a revolutionary movement find themselves confronting people who have taken control over their own lives, rather than armed cadre attempting to impose a vision on the country, potentially obviating military conflict or at least reducing its severity.

Successful dual power rebellions end with the acceptance of the new social forms by much of the populace and the realization by the old rulers that they are no longer capable of using their systems of force against the revolutionary movement.  This can occur because non-cooperation has crippled the old structures of power, because too few people remain loyal to the old rulers to enforce their will, or because the rulers themselves undergo an ideological conversion.
 
At this point, there is not general confusion.   The disappearance of old leaders and structures of power is accommodated by the expansion of the alternative system.
 
The alleged "necessity" for a revolutionary vanguard to guide the revolutionary impulse is shown to have no basis: because the people have already learned how to govern their own affairs, they need no tutelage from above.
 
The possibility of co-option is minimized: "When the people recognize their true power, it cannot be taken away by rhetoric or […] imposition."

Dual power is a strategy, rather than an ideology, and it could plausibly be used to advance a variety of forms of social change.
 
However, the advantages of the strategy make it most compatible with perspectives that emphasize the exercise of power at the community level, that seek to make the revolutionary movement accountable to the people, that see the capability to revision and transform society as common rather than rare, and that seek decentralized forms of power.
 
Call this version of the strategy grassroots dual power, the bottom-up transformation and replacement of the mechanisms of society."
~ Wikipedia

I can't see any way of fixing what we are living with/through now...

So...

I want to use my limited energy on building something new using the Dual Power strategy, approaching it, as a friend suggested, with a spirit of generosity, shifting from the place of problems and deficits (or even finding solutions to these problems) to valuing people for the gifts they bring to community...










Monday, March 12, 2012

If It Be Your Will...


... To some this might seem melodramatic AND... 


“Father, if thou art willing, let this cup pass from me; yet not my will, but thine, be done.” (Mt. 26:39; Mk. 14:36; Lk. 22:42; Jn. 18:10)


LYRICS:

If it be your will
That I speak no more
And my voice be still
As it was before
I will speak no more
I shall abide until
I am spoken for
If it be your will

If it be your will
That a voice be true
From this broken hill
I will sing to you
From this broken hill
All your praises they shall ring
If it be your will
To let me sing

If it be your will
If there is a choice
Let the rivers fill
Let the hills rejoice
Let your mercy spill
On all these burning hearts in hell
If it be your will
To make us well

And draw us near
And bind us tight
All your children here
In their rags of light
In our rags of light
All dressed to kill
And end this night
If it be your will...






Thursday, February 2, 2012

Did You Know...


... that the capacity to 'endure' is VASTLY over-rated?


Enduring this drama...

Someone said to me that other day, that my job right now is to simply 'endure'... and that she marvelled at my capacity to endure... that she didn't know how I was holding it all together...

AND everything that needs to be done is turning into an epic challenge, with seemingly endless roadblocks and obstacles and U-turns...

Holding the reality that a wish to go back to Australia with the boy, has a real chance of turning into me losing custody of him, as his father attempts to paint me an unfit mother...

And what judge - the henchman of the oligarchs - would think me otherwise, looking at our financial and living situation, at my views and choices on "educating" the boy, at my philosophical and political views, at my activism?

What to do to head that off without legal help, without completely turning myself inside out for the system...

What will I do to keep custody of the boy?

What principles will I cave on?

Will it be enough to simply withdraw my Intention to Relocate Notification?

Is that still possible - or have I let things go to far?

And I have to face this - tomorrow... 

Am not 'prepared' in the legal sense because I have no energy or desire to play this game - I just want to go in there, speak my truth and have that accepted...

I'm full, feeling desperate, overwhelmed, on the back foot, confused, bewildered, alone, panic-stricken... 


And yet, I am not the clouds...

I am the always-present sky through which the ever-changing clouds of my emotions form, reform and evaporate as they pass across the sky...


This too, shall pass...

I surrender...

What will be, will be...

(and no, that doesn't mean I give up - it means I give up my desire to control the process and the outcome, I let it unfold...)



 

Saturday, December 17, 2011

Forgive & Forget...


 
"Forgiveness, the first step and binding obligation of non-violence, hangs by a silver cord of love, high in the vault of the cosmos.
 
 
Slender and fine that thread, and woven of four sacred actions of the soul -- mnemon, anamnesis, amnesia, and amnasthakai...
 
 
Memnon -- mindfulness, that which knows. 
 
Anamnesis -- not-not-remembering, the re-call and recitation of what is true, a form of prayer.
 
Amnesia -- not-remembering, the letting go of what does not serve...
 
Amnasthakai -- amnesty, purposely not recalling and reciting, not bringing up again what is past...
 
 
By these deep and sacred actions of the soul do the possibilities of forgiveness hang...

Tonight, breathe forgiveness... 
 
Breathe it in for all that you bear against yourself... 
 
 
Breathe it out, for all that you bear against another... 
 
 
This is the spiritual practice by which a soul can move toward its intentions to the path of non-violence."
 
I offer to all those whom I have hurt in word, deed, thought or omission my deepest regret and sorrow, and ask for your forgiveness...
 
And I offer love and forgiveness to all those who have injured me in any way...
 
 
Seriously!
 
NAMASTE
 
 
 

Saturday, November 26, 2011

Divesting Myself Of My Investments...


OK... living in this huge, lavish house for a week has finally cemented the realisation that our "stuff" really is a millstone around our necks in our current circumstances... 
It's costing us our mobility and flexibility, it's costing us money, sitting in storage, and it's costing our friends' energy, taking up space in their homes...
All "stuff" is energy, and while we're holding onto all this stuff, that's energy not available to us to live fully...
And it's creating an energetic block via the conflict between my mixed emotional needs - the need to live very simply and the need to have an outward manifestation of who I am, a reassurance that I exist, and an (illusory) sense of security...
So - I'm selling all the furniture now, except the boy's bed (he isn't ready for that, even though he hasn't slept in it for more than a year now!)... 
If you're in or near Seattle and you want to exchange cash for beautiful things for your space - furniture, rugs, lamps - then let me know; I've posted photos below, of what we have as it was set up in our last home...
I have to do this if we are going to go back to Australia anyway... might as well start now...
And some of you might have thought this was an obvious solution to my lack of cashflow, BUT, it's not so easy to give up what had meant "home" in one sense... besides, I'm a crab, astrologically - I hold on and I go at things sideways!...
I remember my parents coming with me and my sister from Holland to New Zealand, with all of their lives contained in four wooden tea-chests... and how they worked hard and played by the rules to make a home for us all - and what a toll that took on an already dysfunctional relationship (as it's doing in this family we are staying with)... and how each of them died "owning" a modest amount of "stuff", still paying mortgages, sick and lonely and unhappy...
And I remember 20 years' as a military wife, moving every 9-24 months, just when I had gotten our houses - both rental and owned - looking/feeling like a home...
And I remember coming to the US with the boy, with 46 years' of my life, and 8 months' of his, all contained in 24 boxes...
And I remember creating the home you see here in these photos for me and the boy - the only home we have had in the past 10 years...
And some might think that this is the last of the slide into the gutter, and marks us out as failures in life...
But why shouldn't this be happening to us?   What makes us so special?
People all over this planet have been having to make this choice over the past several millenia.. 
More and more people are facing this reality daily in the "west", and even in these circumstances, we have much more than billions of others on the planet...
And I look at how people in this house are doing life - despite the fact that both adults are working and making good money, they're only holding onto all their beautiful stuff by the skin of their teeth, and I know that we're all going to have to go there, in one form or another, because this way of living on this planet cannot go on... 
And a Facebook friend commented that nomadic life may be the way of the future as we try to avoid flood and storms and drought.   If we work on it now, we may be able to do it well.
As I tell the boy, just as always in my life, we're living ahead of the curve, riding the front edge of the wave...