... the last post was a whiney 'poor me' sulk from a privileged, middle class, middle-aged white woman who really doesn't have anything to bitch about...
In all our travails, my son and I have always still had:
- a warm and dry roof over our heads
- running water, sewer and heating
- clothes on our backs and shoes on our feet
- food for the next meal and some left over
- a vehicle to get us around and petrol in the tank
- books, music, toys and other things with which to entertain ourselves
- medical and dental care when we've needed it
- caring people in our lives
- the ability to access resources to help us
and we still have that... and there is only the NOW... so what am I complaining about?
Is it my sense of entitlement that's driving this dis-satisfaction?
I remember feeling guilty when I was driving us to legal appointments at the Refugee Women's Alliance, when I was dealing with the domestic violence and immigration issues, passing by other women (mostly non-white) waiting with their children, in the rain, at bus stops ...
I remember feeling guilty when I accessed and accepted the help of various agencies in dealing with our issues and needs... there was I, white, middle-class, educated, english-speaking, knowing how and where to look for help, taking/using resources women less equipped than I also needed ...
But then I also had a young child to care for, no money, was an (unintentional) illegal immigrant, had cancer, no family here, no support network - wasn't I just as entitled?
Why shouldn't we all feel entitled?
Don't we all deserve the basic necessities of life, and a little more to satisfy the yearnings of the soul?
And there is enough to go around in this world... the issue is one not one of lack but rather one of control and distribution of resources...
Some of my hard-core socialist colleagues argue that the middle class is the enemy because it doesn't act in solidarity with the working class and the poor against the tyranny of the rich...
But I don't see why anyone should be expected to feel guilty for an accident of birth that placed them in the ranks of the 'haves', rather than the 'have nots'...
And I don't think the solution is to reduce everyone to the level of the 'have nots' just to satisfy the definitions of balance, equality and equity...
What needs to happen is a redistribution of wealth, power, control, resources so that we all have what the English call "elegant sufficiency"... enough to eat to be satisfied and not so much that we're so stuffed we can't move comfortably...
How to make that happen?
What makes people so insecure that they think a bigger house, bigger car, more 'stuff' will give them a safe place in the world, will prove/advertise their value, will give them power and control over their lives?
How many toilets does a family of four really need in one house? How many square feet of space, how many rooms do they need to spread out in?
How to make them aware that when they have/take more than they need, someone, something else, somewhere else has to make do with less than they need, because this is a closed system we're living in?
How to make the uber rich give up 99% of what they have and share that with the 99% of other humans on the planet?
Does an uber rich man like Bill Gates, for example, think about the billions of children starving around the world, as he feeds, clothes and educates his own kids?
Yes, he's doing the philanthropic bit through his Gates Foundation (about which I have some serious questions to ask, on another post), but he is still living a life of excess...
And to make that excess possible, others have to give up necessities...
Which brings me back to my own situation...
Much of where I'm at is a result of CHOICE...
I'm choosing not to rejoin the corporate world; I'm choosing not to do lucrative work that's been offered because I don't want to continue/add to what, in my view, is a severely dysfunctional paradigm...
But where to take that choice next, to build a sustainable life?
How would I live in a more "aware" manner, taking less so that those who "have not" can have more?
I'm living in a large city where communities are not well resourced...
One has to either do without or travel large distances to get what one needs...
I'm driving an older van that's not wonderfully fuel efficient but is very useful for moving 'stuff' from one living space to another!
I'm driving 20 miles each day (2 trips of 10 miles each, there and back) to take my son to school, using gas, time and energy... it seems better to keep him in the same school community to give him some sense of stability and security, than to move him around from school to school as our life circumstances change...
I'm driving 40 miles several times per month to take my son to the dentist to have his retainers adjusted (he doesn't have enough room in his jaws for his adult teeth and the retainers are making that space)...
Why on earth would I drive 40 miles for that? Because I couldn't find another dentist nearby who treats children, who doesn't use flouride and mercury and other toxins to clean, maintain and repair teeth...
I don't buy and hoard large quantities of food/household supplies... I don't buy in bulk... I try to buy organic, locally produced food that's in season...
We don't have all the latest gadgets, electronic toys, fads...
We don't do sports, alcohol, 'fine dining' and 'entertainment'...
I have few wants and desires; I try to live simply - and I know and acknowledge that my version of "living simply" would make other less fortunate people gasp...
Is this attitude one of 'entitlement'?
Am I merely 'justifying' my 'right' to my relative 'wealth'?
What else is it my responsibility to do, to even the scales a little on this planet?
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