What Is Intelligence?

Manu Aluli Meyer reveals what quantum physics and indigenous culture have in common, as well as her vision of a Free Hawai'i...

Mea Culpa, Mea Culpa, Mea Culpa...

There's an adage that says that for every finger we point at someone else, there are three pointing back at us...

Try it - point your forefinger accusingly at someone... 

Look at your hand - three fingers pointing back at yourself...

And as my friend December commented today: "We're all mirrors. Should you not like what you see in others, then it's time to re-examine what you're reflecting."

Which, coincidentally was what I've been thinking about since yesterday's horrible row with my housemates...

1:  What's my responsibility in this mess?

2:  What echos of old wounds am I hearing/feeling?

3:  Who does my housemate represent in my old, unresolved dramas?

4: How am I behaving/treating others in ways similar to my housemate?

5: What maladaptive behaviour do I do to hide my insecurities from myself and others...

 

The second and third questions are easily answered -  my housemate carries the astrological energy of my father and some of the behaviours of my mother... 

And like most of us, I still have some processing, releasing and integrating to do of old crap that comes from having experienced their dysfunctional relationship dynamics and parenting...

Question 1 is also not hard to answer, if I'm willing to be truthful with myself...

In addition to some physical issues that mess with my biology and mood and some emotional hangovers from really stressful experiences, I'm stuck in a place of stubborn resistance to the changes that have occurred in my life over the past 8.5 years...

I said "yes" to something to which I could have said "no", and I'm mad at myself for that.   I saw the red flags and I knew it was going to be a very hard journey and I chose to go along with it anyway... (And the gifts of going on this journey include my wonderful younger son, as well as uncovering toxic patterns that have played out in my family over many generations, and the chance to use that knowledge and decide it stops with me... which is great and sucks at the same time!)

I went into survival mode to deal with domestic violence and breast cancer (which were happening at the same time) and I took care of us (my son and I) and daily business, but had to leave dealing with the emotional fall out until our safety needs were met... The domestic violence triggered echos of abuse in my family when I was young, that has never really been dealt with.   Now that we are no longer in day-to-day crisis, I'm finally feeling the emotional storm and it's no fun!

I have an inner critic that says at 52, I ought to have my life in order - look at what I had way back then and look at what my life is now... It's certainly not in order - instead, it's in complete chaos...    

The critic conveniently ignores the fact that I was living my former life on "auto-pilot", with very little consciousness and no authenticity.   Yes, it was full of the normal 'stuff' and activity and I had my other children, but otherwise it was pretty much empty... 

In fact, that emptiness became so all engulfing that I knew that if I didn't change, my spirit would die.

Do you remember those old cathode-tube televisions? Remember how when you turn them off, that white dot gets smaller and smaller until it disappears into the blackness?

Well, I felt like I was that white dot, and if I didn't change my life, fast, I would completely disappear into that bottomless, endless black hole...

And while I tell other people - my clients - we all do the best we can with what we've got, my inner critic won't allow that truism to apply to me.   

And what makes me so special that it shouldn't apply to me too, you ask?   Nothing at all, so I need to ease up on me...

And there's value in learning to be comfortable with chaos (which my housemate is not - there's one of the reflections I am for her)... All of creation comes out of primordial chaos, so expand within yourself until you can love and honour and completely embrace the chaos.

All healing takes its own time, so be patient  and loving with self as Self seeks out wholeness.

But, in this household I and my 7-year old share with another "alpha" female, her 20-year old daughter and her 31-year old son (downstairs in a lovely self-contained, new, 2-bedroom apartment - where, logically,  my son and I ought to be living!), there's no time and space to do this healing organically.   

According to my control-freak housemates (it takes one to know one!), my "chaos" (which is confined to our two bedrooms) completely ruins the feng shui of the house and they just want me to get my shit together, to stop being a "fat, lazy slob"...

And we've never had the conversation about how we each like to take care of a house - what's "normal" and comfortable for each family, what housekeeping routines we have, how to split up chores...

Thank you, "spiritually advanced" beings, for your patience and understanding - remind me to be equally kind the next time you go through a hard patch in your life!

But they do have a point - I've been slow to get my act together...

In my defence, in the past, I've had a partner and family to help move, and when I didn't have them, I paid young college women to help me pack and clean and unpack.   There's been very little of that assistance this time and certainly no offers from my housemates, who have a large extended family to call on to help meet their own needs and life changes/challenges...

And I'm just plain tired - tired of the crap, tired of the process, tired of change, tired of a sick and dysfunctional world, even tired of my material "stuff"...

I'm still attached to it, and get some pleasure out of being surrounded by beauty, and at the same time, I can't be bothered with it, am not interested in it, don't want to use precious energy and time maintaining it...

Often I just want to walk away from it all - reduce all we own to one backpack with a change of clothes each and some soap and toothpaste and go "walkabout" without a backward glance... 

And that's a second dilemma - how far into the fringe of western existence to go and still have my son feeling like he "belongs" in the world and has the skills to master it...

I need to give up on my son's father ever doing the right thing - more than the very basic legally required of him - and begin to bring in a regular income myself so that we can live well (in spite of the economic depression!)... 

I need to figure out how to get past my abhorrence of how this world (in its capitalist death throes) operates  so I can transact with it in a sensible manner, so I'm not cutting off my nose to spite my face... 

I need to learn for myself and to teach my son how to be "in" the world but not "of" the world - to do what we need to do to navigate through it, while at the same time planting seeds and preparing for the changes that I know are coming, very fast...

How do I "hide" from my own insecurities?

• I pretend everything's OK
• I shrug off the impact of events... "Breast cancer?   What a girl's got to do to get a tummy tuck around here - otherwise it'd be elective surgery and I couldn't afford it"...
• I indulge in magical thinking - things really aren't so bad, and it'll get better by itself, with no action from me
• I don't ask for help
• I expect things to happen because I "deserve" them
• I do the "ostrich" thing - refuse to open letters, take care of business; then, when I'm finally forced to face it, I find it either isn't nearly as bad as my fear (False Evidence Appearing Real) made out, or it costs me 10 times what it would have cost to deal with it promptly
• I downplay my failures to take responsibility and to stay in integrity
• I don't do what for me would be "big"... much of what I have done in my life would be "big" by others' definitions, but they were comparatively easy for me.   I have steered clear of major stepping up and "success"...
• I give myself excuses and blame life and others for the past, making them the reason for my present, when really many of the choices I've made in the past couple of years have nothing at all to do with anyone else
• I'm lured by the grim seductiveness in the idea of being completely destitute, of falling into complete degeneracy - it would be nice to give up, to not clean, not wash, not take care of business, not interact with the world...

I'm not going to deny that everything that has happened has had an effect - it's all about, and only about, cause and effect...

I'm going to step out of being paralysed by that, of wishing that someone would wave a magic wand and make it all better (too bad I left my wand in the Bardo when I incarnated this time, isn't it?!), of hiding, wishing this horrible world would just go away... 

I'm going to take responsibility - not blame... If it's true there are no such things as mistakes, that everything's a learning experience, then there has to be good in all the choices I've made...

Which reminds that my "enlightenment" moment of awareness was all about Divine Chaos... and the love and joy the Life Force experiences in that chaos...

It was around 1993.   I was newly started on my spiritual journey, sitting in my first meditation class.   I focused on what the leader was saying, following his words in my mind... 

Suddenly, I became aware that my physical boundaries were expanding out and out and out, until after some moments I encompassed  THE ALL THAT EVER WAS, IS NOW, AND EVER WILL BE...

I was all of creation, I was LIFE... I saw/heard/felt/knew everything - I WAS  all knowledge, all knowing... I was infinite and at the same time, all of that was contained within me, within my physical body, sitting there on my hard wooden chair...   

There was no "good" or "bad", no light, no dark, no duality - it all just WAS, and all the Life Force wanted to do was experience itself in all of its infinite potential, through us and the rest of creation,  its infinite manifestations of itself, just for the sheer joy of BEING... If I do this, what happens?   If I do that, what happens?   A Sacred  Dance of Cause and Effect...

I felt my heart and mind and body filled with the most amazing love and awe and pure excitement..... and then I came back to ordinary consciousness...

So our human experience has no objective value attached to it - it just is.   It doesn't define me or who I am - an indestructible, immortal manifestation of the Life Force, an integral part of its essence that's just exploring the "what ifs" of all potential.

MIRROR CARD No. 24 RESPONSIBILITY - 
from “The Mirror Cards – A Powerful Tool to Enhance Your Relationship“
created by Geoff Charley & Lucy Lidell

Take your life in your own hands and what happens?
A terrible thing – no-one to blame. Erica Jong

Taking responsibility means acknowledging, owning and fully stepping into your God-state and power. 

Taking responsibility is the mature acceptance that the only person who controls your life is you.

You’re probably feeling hurt or angry at the cards that life has dealt you, or perhaps you don’t understand why someone is treating you in a particular way.

There’s a tough truth to be learned here that, once understood and consistently applied in all situations, will permanently change your perspective on the world and lead to far more rewarding relationships.

You alone are responsible for everything that’s happening to you.

It is only as children that we are entitled to disclaim responsibility.  As adults we must assume responsibility, or forever remain children.

Right now, it’s time to stop playing the victim, and grow up.  The measure of your maturity is how much responsibility you are prepared to take for this situation.  Yet it seems you are still wanting others to take care of you and your feelings, or wanting to blame them for your difficulties.

Responsibility is the ‘ability to respond’, and that can only come if you take back the power you’ve invested in someone else by being a victim and saying you’re not responsible.  What if you were responsible?  Wouldn’t that give you greater authority?

Whatever feelings you are having, they are your responsibility.  NO-one can make you feel, do or be anything unless you, at some level, choose to do so. 

So step back from the issue and ask yourself:  ‘What part am I playing in this situation?‘

If you are wanting to reject this guidance and are thinking you must have drawn the wrong card, you can be sure that it’s relevant to you.  For a person who takes responsibility would now be searching inside to see how these words are appropriate!

The only payoff for not taking responsibility in this situation is the ability to blame.  But is that such a prize to hold on to?

Recognize that you do have power and you’re big enough to take back the responsibility!   YOU ARE LIFE-GOD...

Namaste...

(the Divine in me recognises and honours the Divine in you)

 

 

I Am Woman - Hear Me Roar

Does Evil Exist?

(Repost from 28 June 2010)

I was privileged to lead a breath work session yesterday...

And part of the session included a discussion about the identity and nature of the Life  Force (am staying away from terms such as God/Goddess etc, which are loaded, exclusionary, inaccurate and based in our human need to set in place a hierarchy of power and to anthropomorphise everything we don't understand!)...

Under the holographic principle, the sum of the whole is contained in each of the parts.... so, logically, if one believes that there is an originating Life Force, which is all-knowing, all-loving, infinite and omnipotent, then by extension, as its creations each one of us is also that Life Force - all-knowing, all-loving, infinite and omnipotent... which has huge implications relating to how we see and express ourselves in the world, as powerful beings or as victims?  But that's another day's subject...

Holographic Universe

Evidence from physics and quantum mechanics show that the Observor influences any event or object of consciousness, changing the wave to a particle, the formless to form. Everything is energy. At a subatomic level, all molecules are alive, moving, and conscious. Mind is not just determinative over matter, but mind and matter seem to just be energy vibrating at different frequencies.

Which brings me to the question of whether or not Evil exists...

If one accepts the holographic premise, then Evil cannot exist because all creations of the Life Force ARE the Life Force and one would then have to say the Life Force is evil.  And some might indeed think/feel this, but wouldn't they then also have to consider themselves evil?

A secondary factor to consider is our human need to label events, situations and people, to assign a value to them such as 'good' or 'bad', 'positive' or 'negative', 'ugly' or 'beautiful', 'loving' or 'hateful', 'easy' or 'difficult' etc.

I think we do this to satisfy our need to find order in the chaos, to assign definition so that we can feel secure, so that we can establish a relative place for ourselves in the scheme of things, to give ourselves an (illusory) sense of control and power.

If we were all to be honest with ourselves, this need to label is really quite a pathetic attempt to claim our place at the centre of the universe and to give ourselves an out, an excuse when we don't live up to the sacredness we carry within ourselves!

If we look at the natural world, those value-laden terms mean nothing, have no relevance at all... Things just are...

Some humans might see lightning striking, burning and felling a tree as a negative, sad, disastrous occurrence.    However, for the natural world its just an event, signalling the end of one form of life and the beginning of another, as the felled tree trunk begins to decompose and return to the earth and in the process gives shelter and sustenance to millions of small and microscopic life forms.

So if the Life Force and its creations cannot, by definition, be evil, and if value-laden descriptors are a human construct that have no significance in the rest of creation, how then to understand the "horrifying' things that happen in our own spheres of existence, in the world, in Life?

I've come to understand this from two different perspectives.

The first stems from a meditation experience I had very early on in my spiritually "awake and aware" journey.   As part of this moment, where I experienced actually being ALL THAT EVER WAS, IS NOW AND EVER SHALL BE, I came to know that the Life Force's sole purpose was to experience itself in all of its infinite potential - a gorgeous, awe-inspiring, completely loving cosmic game of "What If..."   If I manifest as this, what happens then?    If I choose this, what follows?    A joyous, wondrous, exciting experiment in CAUSE and EFFECT in which we all are participating as co-creators, as manifestations of that Sacred Life Force.

The second "AHA" moment came in a flash of insight that was sparked by the events of 9/11, took me back to seeing biblical events in a new light and then flash-forwarded to WW2 and Adolf Hitler.

All my "AHA" moments come in the shower - sad, prosaic but true!   And in this one moment when thinking about 9/11, apart from realising that this event was a logical outcome (Effect) after years of American meddling in world affairs (Cause), including responsibility for the deaths of millions under oppressive regimes the US had covertly and overtly helped put in place, I understood that all the people involved in 9/11 had come together in this co-creation to offer us all a gift.

As well as playing out whatever needed to play out for their own and their families' journeys, the 'terrorists', the pilots, the passengers, the people in the towers, the firefighters all had given their lives so that we could make a choice about how we wanted to move on in the world.    They all had the courage to be involved in this event so that we could choose a pathway forward of love, reconciliation and co-operation, not more war and death and misery.

Without the 'terrorists', this event would not have happened.   Imagine a soul - by definition all-loving because it is the Life Force - coming into this lifetime, knowing that it was going to choose and enact a path that would end in death and vilification.    Remember how acting contrary to your true nature feels like a painful, twisting inside.
    

Imagine those other souls, agreeing to co-create this 'painful' event, so that we would each, and as a web of interconnected beings, have the opportunity to step into a new vision of life on this planet...

Sadly, we did not take that step - instead we continued the "power over" game and began more wars.... possibly because, as Marilyn Waring and others before her have pointed out, war-making is a profitable business, is one tool for ensuring "economic growth".

That realisation about 9/11 spiralled my thinking back to the Bible and the place of the Life Force aspect/soul called Lucifer in the scheme of creation.

Human beings need duality to give them a sense of context and place on the continuum of life.    We need contrast to make our choices.    If Lucifer is a creation of the Life Force, IS the Life Force, then Lucifer cannot be evil, unless we accept that the Life Force is evil.    The soul that is Lucifer is serving us in the highest manner possible, giving each of us every day the chance to make choices - life sustaining choices or life destroying choices, choices which expand us further into all we can be or contract and diminish us.

Which then led to the thought that Judas Iscariot also was a hero in the story of the life of the man called Jesus Christ.    Without the 'betrayal' by Judas, the Crucifixion would not have happened, nor the Resurrection, and Christ would not have been able to show us in such a dramatic fashion that we have the choice to live life in a different, more loving manner.

Which then led me to think about all the other 'evil' people in earth's human history, with Adolf Hitler coming most prominently to mind.   Again, Adolf Hitler's choices and actions opened the door for us as a species to decide to change our ways.

I think it was an act of courage and service to us all, for the soul that manifested as Adolf Hitler and all the souls that manifested as the victims and fallen of the Holocaust and WW2 to do what they did.   (And I say these things with respect, from the vantage point of being Dutch and having had my parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles all experience life under the Nazis during WW2)...

Unfortunately, the meaning and impact of those acts of courage seem to have been lost/wasted on us...

Because now we have the BP oil spill and the G8/G20 meetings and protesters, another opportunity to listen to each other, to learn from example and experience, to step into a new, holistic, loving way of being for all life forms on this planet... and there doesn't seem to be much momentum for change being enacted - lots of talk, yes, but action?   No...

Are we a lost cause, this human species?   Is that where the Evil really exists?

PS: Or are we only “lost” in this universe/reality?    Given the multi-dimensional nature of creation, with parallel realities and universes co-existing in the eternal NOW, are all the choices we didn't make in our 'now' playing out in other infinite Life lines?

BREATHE & TRANSFORM YOUR LIFE - its that simple, REALLY!

Well, its that time of the month again, for men and women all! Time to come and breathe your way to a new life... Please join me and discover the amazing benefits of circular breathing...

Date:	Sunday, June 27, 2010
Time:	10:00am - 1:00pm
Place:	5 Focus Fitness
Street:	1009 8th Avenue North, Seattle, WA 98109

Who knew that just a little extra oxygen in the body would bring such amazing results?   Use your breath to:

• Achieve more focus, clarity, energy, motivation and insight.
• De-stress, unwind, unburden yourself from the past month's challenges and set yourself up for a positive, productive, joyful month to come.
• Clear blocks and release fears and other negative, draining emotions.
• Work on specific issues.
• Build and repair relationships and set goals - create an "Unlimited Life". 
• Establish/add to a physical, emotional and spiritual self-care 'maintenance' program.

Sessions consist of experiential teachings around uncovering and releasing sabotaging core beliefs and behavior patterns, plus 90 minutes of Conscious Connected Breathing.

• Appropriate for both beginners and experienced 'breathers'...
• Maximum 15 participants.
• Refreshments provided.
• Bring yoga mat, pillow, blanket and writing materials.
• Cost: $75.00/session (2-hour individual session usually $125.00)

This workshop repeats on the 4th Sunday of every month. Discounts are offered for those who pre-register and pre-pay for more than one session.

email: sahila@metamind-spirit.com or call 206 679 1738 for more information and to register.

Finding & Living Your Own Spiritual Truth

I'm a shaman...

At some point on my journey, I felt I was being asked to choose whether I wanted to be apprenticed to a particular lineage of teachings or whether I was going to walk this path as a solo practitioner...

I chose to walk my own path.

I've studied religions/spiritual traditions from many cultures; at heart, they each say the same thing - the only real difference is the terminology...

I've taken from those teachings what feels 'true' to what I've personally experienced on a mystic level,  I've synthesised what I've learned and now have my own world view that works for me...

That's all that's important really - whatever works to connect me with the Divine and whatever works for you;  all the rest is about power and control and inserting an artificial (and unnecessary) intermediary between humans, the rest of life and the Sacred...

Spirituality and Enlightenment

Some religious traditions suggest that God created man in His own image.   Now, that idea has never sat well with me; I always thought that if that was true, God must be a very ordinary and flawed being and that didn't match the claims made about his infinite power.   Rather, I came to think, unimaginative humans created God in their own image, as an anthropomorphic projection of ourselves.

The ideas about the Divine and Sacred that work for me are based on the holographic principle - the sum of the whole is contained in each of the parts.   

Therefore, if one believes in a Creative Life Force, which is all-knowing, all-powerful, then by extension, we as Its creations are also It - with all that knowledge and all that creative power.   We are each God (I don't usually use that term - its too loaded), but it will do for general understanding.

Once one takes that view on board, it's no longer possible to create excuses, no longer possible to refuse to take responsibility, to be held accountable, to live up to one's full potential - or at least attempt that; and sad to say, there's no going back - once you cross this threshold, you cant pretend you don't know and understand your part in this wondrous co-creation.

And I've had experience in meditation, very early on in my 'awake and aware' journey, of having the boundaries of my physical, mental, emotional and spiritual self expand into infinity and being all of creation - through boundless space, time, the dimensions - being and knowing and understanding all things that were, are and shall be, feeling this most amazing, huge, overwhelming LOVE and the power of that love... and yet at the same time, feeling all of that contained within my smaller human self.

And from my perspective, we are each of us a manifestation of the Life Force, (kinda like a segment of an orange), which desires to explore, express, experience and understand itself in all of its infinite potential.   And in our living, we bring back to the whole that experience and understanding and add to new and greater levels of being.

All of this happens both in linear time and simultaneously - and we each are individuals but we also are each other and everything else in creation at the same time....

I don't think there are values such as good/bad, right/wrong etc.   I think those terms are human-created in an effort to set a baseline for understanding and to appease our need to define, so that we stay in comfort and delude ourselves that we have control.... 

I don't think the Life Force exerts judgment in that way - things just 'are'.   I think/feel/know It just revels in the joy of infinite expansion, experience and understanding.